so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Randomize
