yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
