I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
