how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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