Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
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