I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
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