Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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