Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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