I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
operation harelip BJ is a go
honey bunches of taint.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
