I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Couch. On fire.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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