I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
do herpes really smell.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
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