And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Randomize