You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
