I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
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