Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
