Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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