I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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