She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
As shirtless as possible
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize
