Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
