She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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