i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
