While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
