I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
