Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
