But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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