apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
