I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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