THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Randomize
