You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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