Your dad touched me again.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Randomize
