Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
