New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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