in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
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