Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
