you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
