So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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