I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
time to smoke my breakfast
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
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