Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize
