so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Randomize
