The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
