Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
