You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
