thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
