TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Randomize
