Pappa wants mamma naked
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
it's great music for shaving your balls
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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