Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
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