his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Randomize