I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Randomize