Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Randomize
