if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
