Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I'm really busy with my period
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